I’m engaged, now what?

It’s engagement season and it’s your turn, you’ve said “YASSS!”, sent the proposal video to your entire group chat, called your family, made it Facebook official and spammed everyone’s Insta-feed.

I had one of my clients tell me recently that they sat down and realized they had a wedding to plan but didn’t know where to start. So what did they do? “We looked up: “How to plan a wedding on Youtube”- my mouth dropped. The reason? They hadn’t been to many weddings, but their Youtube search lead them to WeddingWire, which lead them to me, so everything is right in the world now! Here’s a few tips to help you get the ball rolling.

Line up your wedding planning resources

After you’ve decided on a date, it’s time to start researching and for that, you need a couple of good resources to guide you. Wedding Wire is a very popular website that showcases wedding vendors in your area! Everything from beautiful venues, talented photographers, elegant floral designers, rental companies you name it. Snuggle up with a glass of wine, make a list of the vendors you need to hire and create an account on Wedding Wire. Research one category at a time, it can get overwhelming fast, be sure to read reviews and choose 3 vendors per category and reach out to them for info on their services and prices.

Talk Money

You might not realize it but having an idea as to what your ballpark budget is will be extremely helpful. Sit down and talk with your partner about what that number looks like, if it’s realistic and most importantly- do you both agree on it? Today’s wedding’s typically cost more than most couples project so round that number up and over project and try to stay under that. Both of you decide the top 3 most important aspects of your wedding you want to splurge on, for example: food, entertainment and photography. Prioritize those items and whatever remains from your wedding budget can go towards the other areas.

Don’t rush in

It’s crucial that with any potential vendor you are thinking of hiring, have a conversation with them. Emails are great to get facts and service information, but you are hiring a whole person with the service they provide. Their photos look great online, their music sample sounds energetic and upbeat, their flower arrangements are exactly what you are looking for- but do your personalities jive? It’s likely you will be working with this person for months, if you don’t get along or like their system of doing things, if your expectations don’t match the way they do their work, it might not be a good fit. So, schedule a phone call, no matter how tiresome it seems and get to know them!

Have a checklist and follow it

If you decide not to hire a planner to do the leg work for you then you will absolutely need a checklist to help keep you on schedule and on track. There might be items on the list that may or may not apply depending on the type of wedding you’re planning to have but at least have it as a guideline. Here’s a free complete Wedding Planning Check List PDF

Lastly? Stay as organized as possible and if you aren’t organized and get easily confused, overwhelmed or just don’t have the bandwidth in your already busy life? Hire. A. Planner. You can’t put a price on peace of mind.

Engagement Season: Never Stress! How to quickly find the best Toronto vendors before your wedding in 2020 with ease

With 3 months of engagement season still left, it really is the most exciting time of the year. There’s nothing we love more than getting excited inquiries in our inboxes:

“I’m getting married on __________ 2020 and we are interested in learning more about your services!”

That type of email is typically a very preliminary step in the search for your team of wedding vendors that will take you from planning to wedding day. But there are some key steps that you absolutely cannot miss if you want the best vendors for your wedding. Now they may not be the best in Toronto, but they are the best for YOU. Remember that!

  1. It’s more than just about pricing

CO0A9361There are so many moving parts within the services that wedding professionals offer and it can be difficult to know exactly what the value of a service should be when you know nothing about it. So- you need to deepen your knowledge of what these professionals do. It’s not as simple as slapping a cake together the night before, or ordering some flowers to make some table arrangements. In order to truly appreciate the value of a service, you have to understand it. Ask questions! If you don’t understand why the flowers you want are so expensive? Ask. If you don’t realize how much time and money (yes I said money) goes into planning a wedding? ASK. Get a better understanding of the service, what it entails, the amount of time and resources it takes and once you understand that, pricing will make sense.

2. Don’t just communicate via email

portrait of young woman using mobile phone in cafe

Okay, no one has time, we’ve established this and making time is a pain but it’s necessary. Why? Because you aren’t JUST hiring a decorator, you aren’t JUST hiring a planner, you aren’t JUST hiring a DJ- they are a whole person. Yes, they are providing a service and the service might be amazingly priced and they might do stunning pictures…but what if you don’t get along? What if you don’t like their process? What if they don’t feel the need to respond to emails as quickly as you would like? What if their laid back manner makes you feel like they aren’t taking your concerns seriously? Wedding professionals are PEOPLE with personalities, do they mesh with you? You can’t always tell over email so get on the phone with them or meet them for coffee. Your level of comfort and how reassured you feel afterwards will assist you greatly when choosing from such a large pool.

3. Respond to emails

close up photography of woman sitting beside table while using macbook

This one drives me batty and yes, I’m going to call it as I see it. 9 times out of 10 you reach out to wedding vendors to get more information, pricing etc. Wedding professionals respond (hopefully in a timely manner) send you information, and then radio silence. You reached out to us, needing our assistance. Have the courtesy to respond back, even if you decide to go with someone else. Let us know, we won’t be offended but to just leave us in limbo is not only rude, but it doesn’t make for a professional relationship. Frankly, a client that doesn’t respond to my emails is telling me they don’t value my service at all. If the expectation if for wedding pros to respond to YOU within a certain amount of time, why can’t we have the same expectation? I don’t keep wedding dates open for long, if I have to send more than 2 follow up emails, I already don’t want to work with you because you don’t value my time. Someone else will!

4. Be transparent

MakeupTell us what you want! Don’t be “iffy” or constantly change your mind (because that is a huge mistake that will cost you!). Just let us know what you want, what you are thinking, what is your best case scenario, what are back up options and we will do whatever we can to make it happen. And if you don’t know…tell us that too! We are there to work it out and work alongside you, that’s how we support you. I love being able to present options to a couple if they “just don’t know” because at the very least it gives you some ideas to start with. But if you don’t tell us what you want, what your vision is, we can’t give you our best. We can’t streamline our talent and creativity without being pointed in some sort of direction. This is YOUR day, we will make it happen if you just tell us what you want!

The Best Black Friday deals ever in Toronto to consider shopping this season before you get married in 2020

Vanessa-Pavin-Wedding-Sneak-Peeks-002.jpgEngagement season has just begun and Black Friday is around the corner. You might be thinking “What on earth do I shop for on Black Friday that’s wedding related!?” Keep reading!

Black Friday sample sales & trunk shows

If you don’t have your wedding dress or your bride tribe doesn’t have their dresses, this is the perfect opportunity to shop. Dying for a designer gown? Kleinfeld Canada is having a Black Friday Sample Sale where you get up to 90% off gowns by Clara Rosa, Pnina Tornai and Maggie Sottero. Call 416.861.4800 to book your appointment.

Buy wedding favors in bulk

Vanessa-Pavin-Wedding-Blog-Images-183If you’re having a larger wedding and need to buy favors in bulk? Now is the time to start looking for exactly what you want! Hop onto Amazon and be sure to set yourself up for Prime and research pricing and quantities. Black Friday deals mean price reductions and savings on items you are looking to nab!

Order wedding invitations for less

If you are considering cute “Save the Dates” or actual wedding invitations, websites like Minted that typically offer percentages off will have a great Black Friday sale. Create an account and start browsing invitation styles and be sure you know exactly what you want to go on the invite. You want to be able to take advantage quickly. Also, side note, since these guys are online, it might be worth it to wait until Cyber Monday when deals are better and geared towards online shopping!

by l'orangerie photographie

Coupon codes for printing wedding stationary

Are you designing your own seating chart? Signage for dessert and cocktail tables? Name place cards? If you have everything ready to go on a USB stick, Vista Print is your next stop! Upload your designs where you want them, check them over carefully and plug in that Black Friday coupon code!

Black Friday deals on wedding accessories

Oakview+Terrace+Wedding+-+Bridal+Dress-20No better time of the year to shop for shoes and jewelry! If there is a gorge pair of earrings you’ve been eyeing or a cute pair of casual sneaks your considering wearing for the reception- do it! Black Friday deals will likely be starting this week and only get better as the actual day approaches. Do your homework and price things out and DO NOT WAIT! If your shoe size is popular (think size 7) or your size is carried in limited quantities (like 10) get them if you find them.

Shop Black Friday gifts for your wedding party

Planning on getting everyone something similar or really personalized? Black Friday is the opportunity you’ve been waiting for. Shop around for some ideas if you aren’t quite sure what you want, and make some calls to ensure the quantities you need are available. Nothing can really be set aside that day, its typically first come first serve so be ready.

Wedding planner reveals 4 common mistakes couples must be quick to rethink to avoid jaw-dropping disaster

Your wedding day is a huge investment, not just of money but of time and effort. You want it to go smoothly but it might all backfire if you are doing any of these things.

Changing your mind too many times

Oakview+Terrace+Wedding+-+Bridal+Portraits-83We know it can be tough to commit to one idea, color or concept- there is so much beautiful inspiration, you would do all if it if you could. But you can’t. It’s one thing to think you want one thing and then change your mind, we can deal with that, it happens! Now if you change your mind multiple times, before, during and after meetings and consultations- this is where it gets tricky. Have you ever tried to navigate through an email feed that contains 27 communications trying to find the most recent requested changes? Having to update notes too many times can result in something being forgotten or overlooked, we’re human and it can get confusing. Another issue that stems from this that couples get upset over is that every time you change your mind, the price changes. This leads to having to update another quote and emailing that off, which takes more time. It also means you have less time to execute or place orders because nothing has been concretely decided.

Procrastinating until the last minute

Now, if you wait too long to make decisions (possibly because you keep changing your mind!) this will work against you. Of course we aren’t saying to rush into anything, this is your wedding, you want to think things out clearly and determine what you both want and what works within your budget. However, if you wait until a few weeks before to make choices about crucial elements like décor, entertainment, flowers, food/desserts you will be in for a shock. Vendors get booked fast for wedding dates by couples who know what they want. Certain décor items may already be rented if you wait too long to decide. Flowers must be ordered way in advance or you are looking at a significant increase in price and the possibility of the flowers you want not being available. To wait too long will cost you!

Not starting your seating chart early

Oakview+Terrace+Wedding+-+Reception-19You’re probably thinking “but why? I should just wait to get all my RSVP’s in…”, we guarantee that you will not get all of your RSVP’s in by the deadline date. In fact, we guarantee you will have to designate someone to call people to get their confirmation. If you know off the bat which guests will absolutely come, get those names on a tentative excel sheet and organized into a table. If they need to be swapped later that is fine but get their names, family members and plus 1’s on there. Waiting until you get all of the RSVP’s means you will be way too close to the wedding date trying to get this done and if you’ve chosen to do it yourself, you will not have as much time or energy as you think. Also, keep track of who you invite but don’t give a formal invite too, we’ve seen guests show up and NOT be on a seating chart because they were forgotten!

Micromanaging your wedding planner

We know you want your day to go perfect and we know your organizational skills are superb but so are ours! That’s why your hired us! The day of the wedding is when you relinquish control (cringe…yes we said it), and enjoy your day. Let us worry about making sure Uncle Joe doesn’t get his hands on a microphone, your limo shows up on time and that no one in the family takes it upon themselves to try to change the seating chart the day of because they don’t’ like it (yes, we’ve had that almost happen). Your planner is more than capable of handling those things and more while you spend time with your nearest and dearest and celebrate your beautiful day. Let us do what you’ve paid us to do!

If you choose not to hire a planner, here’s a Wedding Planning Check List PDF you can download to help keep you on track!

100 Insanely smart tips to help a busy bride stay on budget and save money while planning a beautiful wedding

  1. Keep your guest list small
  2. Choose flowers that are in season
  3. Consider a Friday or Sunday wedding
  4. Create & print your own invites- here’s a discount code for Minted
  5. Get married on off-peak season (November-April)
  6. Skip the plated meal and do a buffet
  7. Have more comfort food and snacks vs formal food options
  8. Rent certain items vs buying them
  9. Choose a non-traditional wedding venue: municipal park or beach
  10. Google local sample sales and trunk shows for your wedding gown
  11. Shop local outlet stores for bridesmaids’ dresses
  12. Purchase handmade items directly from the seller e.g. Etsy
  13. Ditch favors or limit them to 1 per couple
  14. Keep the ceremony and reception at the same place to cut down rentals, transportation and décor
  15. Rent your wedding dress
  16. YouTube makeup tutorials or go to Sephora for a makeup lesson then do your own makeup
  17. Swap in a sweet table instead of a dessert course
  18. Buy your own booze for the wedding
  19. Only serve appetizers during the cocktail hour
  20. Find a music student(s) to entertain during cocktail hour or for the ceremony (have them audition first!)
  21. Find a newer cake artist to make your cake
  22. Swap your cake for smaller cupcakes or tarts
  23. Limit the bar hours or have an alcohol-free wedding
  24. Instead of multiple shooters, only have 1 photographer
  25. Use wildflowers as fillers in your centerpieces
  26. Opt for sparkling wine over champagne
  27. Use a credit card to pay for vendors etc that has points or rewards so you get something back
  28. Google local wedding shows to get deals on potential vendors
  29. Use coupons or Facebook Marketplace to score deals on accessories or décor items
  30. Hire a wedding planner; what you pay them to do will end up being made up in savings because they can negotiate contracts and save you time
  31. Schedule to do cake cutting and first dance earlier in the evening to cut down on photography hours
  32. More than 3 courses for dinner might be excessive, guests should be fed but don’t overdo it
  33. Have a smaller cake created for display and cutting and have a larger slab cake in the back that gets served to guests
  34. Have a smaller bridal party to cut down costs and possibly hassle
  35. Ditch the bridal party altogether and just have a flower girl and ring bearer to save on gifts
  36. Use a playlist for the cocktail hour and dinner and a DJ for the reception party
  37. Cocktails and mixed drinks are usually more expensive at the bar so limit the options to beer and wine
  38. See if the venue has larger tables so you cut back on the amount of centerpieces
  39. Use something other than flowers for your centerpieces such as candles, picture frames, lanterns
  40. Elope or do a pop-up wedding
  41. Consider emailing your “Save the Dates”
  42. Only invite people you are close to you (you’ve seen and hung out with them in the last 5 years)
  43. Stick to the house wines offered instead of specialty ones
  44. DIY certain wedding items
  45. If one of your friends recently got married and kept some of their décor, ask to borrow it
  46. Buy things like candles and favors in bulk, the price is usually less (buy more than 50 pieces)
  47. Have your shower or rehearsal at home instead of a restaurant
  48. Naked cakes look lovely or instead choose buttercream icing over fondant
  49. Kids meals are cheaper so be sure to ask for a kids menu if you plan to have kids at the wedding or have no kids at all
  50. Only have 1 or 2 options for vegetarian or vegan meals, the more choices the more money
  51. Borrow accessories from friends or a family member instead of buying them
  52. Have the wine at dinner served rather than sitting on the table so consumption is staggered during the evening
  53. Don’t forget tips, shipping fees and taxes and gratuity to be factored into your budget
  54. Decide if you are allowing +1’s or not, additional guests can impact your budget greatly
  55. Negotiate pricing on some contracts
  56. Read over contract carefully and ask questions, it’s very easy to misunderstand something and then get overcharged
  57. Enable people to RSVP on a website instead of traditional paper RSVP’s, plus it’s easier to track
  58. See if your venue has a list of preferred vendors, sometimes they want you to use them but it might cost you. Ask if you are permitted to use outside vendors. They may require approval
  59. Find a venue that needs minimal décor
  60. Get married in a backyard garden to save on venue and décor costs
  61. Price shop for vendors to before booking anything to see if there are comparable prices available
  62. Avoid getting married on a Saturday or a long weekend, it’s the most expensive day to get married
  63. Keep appetizers between 2-3 pieces per person and keep in mind the caterer will likely try to up sell you
  64. If you are wearing a longer dress, no one will see you shoes so why splurge?
  65. Go through each item on your budget to see if there are ways to trim it down
  66. Everyone loves a good wedding trend but they are usually pricey because they are in high demand
  67. Hand write your place cards/escort cards or design them on Minted
  68. Research various wedding budgets and revise yours based on what your research finds
  69. Thank you’s to the bridal party are lovely but don’t have to break the bank
  70. Consider one big single bloom for the bouquets
  71. Don’t let vendors rope you into more than you want too (a planner can help with this) you can politely decline any add-ons
  72. Florists typically charge more for labor so buy your own flowers in bulk to save
  73. Stick to a signature cocktail during the cocktail hour and have it passed around. It will not only save on alcohol but will add a nice personal touch as well.
  74. Can we say: “Free wedding stationary printables” We said it.
  75. Instead of renting a nice car, can you borrow one from someone you know?
  76. Keep all of your receipts so you can monitor what you’ve spent
  77. Ask guests to email their RSVPs to you directly and keep an email file folder of them
  78. Choose a venue outside of a major city. Costs of downtown venues and parking can make sticking to your budget difficult
  79. Wait for a good deal to take your honeymoon instead of right afterwards. Check out Skyscanner or Next Vacay
  80. Get a dress that actually fits instead of off the rack and needing expensive alterations
  81. When in doubt, don’t buy a dress a size or two too small, it’s easier to make a larger dress smaller than the opposite
  82. For any out of town guests, ask hotels close by the wedding venue for reduced rates based on rooms booked
  83. Instead of expensive centerpieces, have empty vases on the tables and use the bridesmaid’s bouquets as centerpieces
  84. Troll Instagram and wedding websites for contests and giveaways
  85. Go to Wedding Wire and see if any vendors you need are offering discounts on their services
  86. Buy as much as you can in bulk (food, flowers, candy) rather than specialty stores that will have higher prices
  87. Shorten your planning time, you will be much more decisive with a strict timeline
  88. Only have the photographer and videographer cover just the ceremony
  89. See if videography can be added to your photography package instead of hiring 2 separate vendors
  90. Any leftover wedding items you have, sell them online
  91. Use the word “wedding” only when necessary (like with venues and photographers) sometimes there’s an up charge
  92. Only splurge on ONE thing like good food or music
  93. Find out if there is a minimum spend at the venue if they have in house catering. Usually if you make the minimum spend, they waive the venue rental fee
  94. Keep your invites to a singe sheet, pretty but simple. It will save on postage
  95. Ask friends to help where they can, as ushers, officiant, MC, DJ
  96. Sew your own table runners with fabric you purchase yourself
  97. Silk and paper flowers go a long way
  98. Skip the traditional wedding dress shops and go to major retailers like Le Chateau or Etsy for your dress
  99. Consider a different time of day: Morning or afternoon so you save on dinner food
  100. Make sure you and your partner are both on the same page on where to splurge and where to cutback!

How to avoid bride tribe drama

Choosing your bridesmaids and MOH is supposed to be the easiest part but the reality is, sometimes it doesn’t turn out the way you thought it would and there’s drama. What would cause something like this to happen and if it happens, how do you handle it?

Let’s talk prevention, this isn’t to say everything will go perfectly but a first step for you is to look at each of your potential wedding party candidates and their current lifestyles and circumstances. I guarantee taking the time to do this one thing will eliminate 60% of potential problems. Take comfort in knowing that none of your girls will turn down the opportunity to support you on your big day they love you! But it’s possible that depending what they are juggling in their personal lives can and will interfere with them living up to the expectations of their role in the bridal party. They would never do it on purpose but most of us at some point in time have bitten off more than we can chew and over-promised to someone what can or can’t take on. So, look at what they are dealing with in their lives, if any of them have circumstances that at times are all consuming, or perhaps they aren’t organized or consistent, you might want to rethink giving them a large role. Doing this from the start will help minimize potential issues tremendously.

Bridesmaids

Second step, when you finally have your bride tribe in place lay out your expectations. 9 times out of 10, miscommunication is at the root of most planning faux pas. When everyone is fully aware of and understand their responsibilities, there’s less room for error. It’s not entirely a bad idea to even sit down with all of them and work on a little timeline for example, what month you would prefer to have your bridal shower, ideas on your bachelorette- get it all out while you have everyone there. Side note: have the money talk. It might be uncomfortable but the bottom line is, being part of a wedding costs money. Be transparent about this and make sure that everyone is able and willing (yes, I said willing on purpose) to put money aside for wedding related events, trips and attire etc. If one of your girls isn’t in the position, ask them privately to let you know. You wouldn’t believe the strain money causes on friendships and bottom line, if your friend can’t pull her weight, it complicates so many things. Your other bridal party members have to pick up the financial slack, the cost of their dresses will be cause for contention- the list goes on.

Bridesmaids Nneka 6775

Third step, try your best to spend time with your bridal party members, all of them altogether AND separately. Keep in mind, if some of your bridal party members don’t know one another, breaking the ice is a good idea. Not all personalities jive and don’t expect it from your girls and it’s okay as long as there is still respect. This is a time where you want to strengthen the bonds of your friendship and enjoy the journey of this upcoming new stage in your life. It makes them feel important and appreciated, yes this is your wedding but don’t get so caught up in the planning that you forget about the people you care about most and who are taking on a lot to support you. Do something special for each of them and do your best to always acknowledge their efforts.

Once you are engaged the next most exciting part is getting your bridal party chosen and why wouldn’t it be your nearest and dearest? It should be! But do your homework, don’t have unrealistic expectations, be transparent and spend time with them. Keep your friendship at the focal point and all of you will have a beautiful experience planning your wedding.

How to rock a venue open house

If you are recently engaged, living in the big TO and still shopping for the perfect venue, this blog post is for you! January-March are the months when venues host an event called an “open house” to showcase the venue’s potential for a wedding. They hire wedding vendors such as a DJ, catering company and sometimes an entertainment company for the evening. You will get to enjoy wine, finger foods, a band or a DJ while getting to check out a venue that might work for your wedding day.

What to look for

Sight-lines

When you look around the room, do you see any large pillars that disrupt a clear line of vision? This is one of the most important things you need to look for when searching for a venue. When you imagine the set up, will anything block the guests view of the ceremony or honor table during the reception? Will photographs look strange? If the room is open concept you are good to go but if it’s a venue with a bit more of a rustic/industrial look, its not a “all bets are off” scenario but careful consideration of the setup will be required.

Washrooms

Besides cold food, nothing is worse than a 200 plus wedding guest count and a one stall washroom…that the bride can barely fit in. Washrooms are a big deal ladies; are they properly cleaned and well stocked (yes snoop those cupboards!!) Does anything look like it’s in need of maintenance? Do the toilet’s flush properly, is there hot water to wash hands, are the soap dispensers full? How many washroom stalls are there and is it wheelchair accessible?

Special Amenities

Another great thing to peep is aspects of the venue that are unique and special. Some venues have an outdoor patio which is great for when you need to get some air. What a about a rooftop patio, who doesn’t love a view? Is there any natural lighting that you love which will translate into beautiful city lights at night and add to the ambience the evening? If you have a summer wedding, do they have a garden area you could gain access too? Parking anyone?!

Wedding Packages

Whether it’s when you first walk in, or are walking out, someone should be handing you a cute little gift bag with a cookie, business cards, gift cards and a wedding package from the venue. It will give a very detailed outlining of what they offer, what’s included and not included in their packages and pricing.

So, call up a few of your girlfriends or bridal party for that matter, when you RSVP include how many will be accompanying you. Don’t eat a heavy dinner since there will be plenty for you to munch on when you get there. Enjoy the entertainment, music and wine and look out for these 4 things I mentioned. It’s a great way to have a nice free little girls’ night out while searching for your wedding venue.

Below are a couple of upcoming venue open houses this month and next, so if you haven’t chosen a venue yet, now’s your chance to see it completely done up and at it’s full potential!

Eg West  Richmond

Ease planning pains with our NEW services

Happy Summer everyone! AVPEvents is super excited to launch and share our new service menu with you all!

It’s taken us some time to re-create our services to give more options to brides with different needs. All 4 services are unique and are designed to cover various aspects of the planning process.

Short & Sweet

Just as the name suggests! One of the most daunting aspects of wedding planning is at the very end when you have the paper details to complete. So, we sit down for a 3-hour session and complete the day of timeline, reception timeline, ceremony layout and contact list. Once we’ve finalized this with you, we then email it out to all the vendors who need it and voila!

Smooth & Flawless

Should a wedding ceremony be anything less? Well our job for this package is to give you the “Short & Sweet” package and then coordinate the rehearsal of the ceremony run through twice! The day of the wedding, we show up an hour before the ceremony to check over last minute details, line up your processional, fluff your dress and send you off down the aisle.

Polished Production

This package comes with 6 additional hours of planning on-top of the benefits of both the Short & Sweet package as well as the Smooth & Flawless. We also finalize the details of the reception set up. Once the reception has been executed according to the timeline, our last task is to ensure your personal belongings are packed and ready to go!

Quintessential Package

Your equivalent of partial planning is this service! The previous 3 packages are included and in addition, couples receive 15 planning hours allocated to whatever areas they like!

Of course, we offer full planning for those couples who want assistance through every aspect of planning. A sit-down consultation is required for this service so each couples needs and vision can be properly assessed.

The Shocking Revelation in the bridal industry!

One subject amidst the bridal industry that I really feel people tiptoe around is that of lack of inclusion in wedding blogs and web/print publications. Maybe this isn’t something I am supposed to talk about but…here I am- and I’m not sorry.

It’s not to say there aren’t diverse publications that cater to multi-cultural audiences, it’s great but why separate publications? I grew up in a community where I was, for many years, the only bi-racial kid around and believe me when I tell you- it was hell. Different skin color, different body type, different hair, different facial features, plus a family of limited means. From public school, throughout high school it was just me and then I moved to Ottawa for university. It was then that I experienced being around people who looked like me, people I could relate too. I can’t describe to you the utter joy I felt living in a city where I didn’t feel like the literal “black sheep”.

When I first joined the wedding industry I made a point to get familiar with certain wedding publications and while I was enthralled (to say the least) with all the work that was showcased, yet I was shocked.

The stark reality is that there are publications that are for separate demographics and it can work…sort of. Of course, when you become a planner you must decide your niche market and how best to target them. But in doing so, it seems to create a distinct barrier.

I do realize I may be stirring the pot but here is the reality- I’ve had clients come up to me and tell me that have purchased certain magazines for inspiration but didn’t see themselves as any of the brides or models. They weren’t able to identify with what they were seeing and for them it was frustrating but that was their experience. So, I ask “Why don’t publications, magazines and blogs make a point to include a certain number of multi-ethnic shoots as features, editorials or submissions?”

But far beyond race, size and sexual orientation, recently the popular online blog Style Me Pretty pledged their dedication towards creating a space that focused on inclusion on their Instagram. While this was a huge step for them, some of the comments on their Instagram post even went to the point of highlighting other aspects of inclusion being overlooked still:

  • Special needs couples
  • Brides with natural hair/Afros
  • Budget friendly (pretty doesn’t have to be pricey)
  • Hiring people on their staff who understand diversity

Simply some food for thought.  In a society as liberal as ours it would be nice to see more inclusion in the larger magazines and blogs. If brides cannot see themselves in the dresses, with the flowers then it’s a huge missed opportunity and the message these real brides take away is this: the world’s beauty standard women have fought so hard against hasn’t changed in the bridal industry. On the bright side, it is my sincere hope to start seeing a wider range of  inclusion much sooner rather than later!

 

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How to prepare for your wedding planning consult

It doesn’t take long after your acceptance of the proposal for you to realize there is piles of work to do! It can seem daunting but one of the wisest things you could consider doing is hiring a planner. If it’s not a full planning, day of coordination can take so much weight off your shoulders.

When you start your search for a planner here are some questions you need to be prepared to answer:

  1. “What is your wedding date?” Seems like it shouldn’t be a big deal if you don’t have that figured out just yet, but the reality is that planners live by schedules. So, in order for us to even know if we are available to help you- we need to know your wedding date!
  2. “What is your total wedding budget?” Having this discussion with your partner before you book a consultation is important. Most potential clients want to know how much planning costs, but we can’t give proper quotes for services unless we know what your max budget is.
  3. “How many guests do you plan to have?” This is another important question that helps planners determine their fee. To put into perspective: If you plan to have 300 guests, it’s common sense that a planner would then need an assistant. Paying an assistant will be factored into whatever quote is given.
  4. “Do you have a venue yet?” If you do then let us know, we have already done a wedding there and have connections we can utilize. On the flip side, if we haven’t done a wedding there, then a site visit will be necessary, so we can meet the coordinator and see the space.
  5. “What is your vision?” WHAT DO YOU SEE??! When you think of your wedding day, what do you envision it to be like? Rustic chic with pastels and copper accents? Modern minimalist with greenery and crisp white linens? When you know your “couple style” it makes it easier to create a “inspiration/mood” board. We need to see and feel what you do!
  6. “Are there any “absolutely no ways” for your wedding day?” Certain family members, colors, number of dresses…as planners coming up with ideas is part of the job, but we don’t want to come up with suggestions that are a no go on your list. So be clear about what you do not want…ever.
  7. “What service are you interested in?” This can be discussed at the consultation but to have a general idea is helpful for us. If you are a super busy couple, always on the go and worry about not having time- full planning might be the best option. If your wedding is a few months away and you’ve done a portion of the planning, then partial planning might work better. Day of coordination is for couples who want to undertake the planning aspects but have a planner manage the day of execution, so they can enjoy the day.
  8. “What do you want in a planner?” Not all planners will ask you this, but I will. Do you want someone who leaves most of the decision making up to you? Or is trusting someone to take charge and take the lead more what you want?

If you are prepared to answer these key questions, you will have a very productive first consult with your potential planner!